The end is nigh for England’s forlorn Ashes hopes, as it has been ever since they went into their shells on the second day of this third Test.
Set a near-impossible 435 to prevent Australia from going 3–0 with two to play, and retaining the urn that has been theirs since 2017-18, England closed on 207 for six after three late strikes from Nathan Lyon ended any lingering hopes of a miracle.
From 177 for three, Lyon got rid of Harry Brook for 30 (bowled leg stump after missing an ambitious reverse sweep), Ben Stokes for five (bowled off stump by a beauty that turned past his defensive prod) and Zak Crawley for an accomplished 85 (neatly stumped by Alex Carey as he played forward, overstretched and missed).
That made it 194 for six with half an hour to go, raising the possibility that one more wicket before the 5.30pm cut-off would trigger – at the umpires’ discretion – an extra 30 minutes, and a four-day finish. Instead, Jamie Smith and Will Jacks clung on grimly to stumps.
No matter. Even with a bit of morning rain forecast in Adelaide tomorrow, Australia will wrap up the series in 11 days’ cricket, equalling England’s quickest Ashes surrender since 1921. You’d have to be a sadist or an Australian to have enjoyed it.
If one Australian great ran through England’s middle order as the shadows lengthened, another had undermined them early on.
Ben Stokes’ side are on the brink of equalling England’s quickest Ashes surrender since 1921
Zak Crawley made an accomplished 85 as England attempted to stage some resistance
Nathan Lyon removed Crawley after the spinner had accounted for Harry Brook and Stokes
Pat Cummins missed the first two Tests as he nursed his sore back, but has bowled in this game like the champion he is. In the first innings, he got rid of Crawley, Joe Root and Jamie Smith. Now, he struck with his second ball, in the last over of the morning session, as Ben Duckett prodded haplessly to Marnus Labuschagne at second slip.
Duckett’s removal for four took his haul for the series to 97 runs at 16, a desperate disappointment given his record and talent. The removal of Ollie Pope for 17, on the other hand, came as no surprise whatsoever.
Jittery outside off stump from the start, he finally paid the price for his jumpiness, even if it took a magnificent low catch by Labuschagne, lunging to his left and clinging on one-handed, to remove him. If England replace Pope with Jacob Bethell at the MCG, he might just have played his final Test innings.
And Cummins was again the bowler when Australia needed to break a lively third-wicket stand that had reached 78 when Root fiddled outside off and was caught behind for 39. It was a carbon copy of his first-innings dismissal, and Root knew it, punching his bat in self-reproach as he turned for the pavilion.
For a while, Crawley and Brook kept Australia at bay, making liberal use of the sweep and reverse sweep to put a dent in Lyon’s figures, and oblige Cummins to turn to the lesser off-breaks of Travis Head.
But Brook picked the wrong ball for another reverse, misjudging the length and losing control of a delivery that spun back and bowled him round his legs. When Stokes and Crawley, for his highest score in two and a half years against a team other than Zimbabwe, followed in quick succession, the Australians scented blood.
Earlier, their own second innings had ended in a surprising hurry, after Head and Carey extended their fifth-wicket partnership to 162.
But with Stokes opening the bowling after not sending down a single over on the third day because of exhaustion, and Josh Tongue replicating the captain’s fuller length, England looked more threatening than they had throughout Friday.
Head departed for 170 with Australia ultimately setting England a target of 435 to win
Head finally departed for 170, caught by Crawley at deep midwicket after trying to deposit Tongue into the Sir Donald Bradman Pavilion, at which point the floodgates opened, even though Australia’s lead was now approaching 400.
Stokes had Carey caught by Brook at leg slip for 72, before Tongue induced a tame nibble from Josh Inglis, who is surely the favourite to lose his place for the Boxing Day Test at Melbourne when Steve Smith returns from injury.
Cummins edged a drive off Brydon Carse to first slip, where Brook held his fourth catch of the innings, and Carse was on a hat-trick after pinning Nathan Lyon leg-before first ball.
Scott Boland survived that, then popped up a return catch to the diving Jofra Archer, to complete a collapse of six for 38. Tongue finished with four for 70, his wicket-taking knack intact, and Carse a slightly flattering three for 80. He now has 14 wickets in the series, five more than Archer and Stokes, but could be given a breather at the MCG.
But it will all be cosmetic in any case. The Ashes are gone, and England will be playing simply to avoid the ignominy of a whitewash.